This is hilarious.
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List: Items that Philosophers Presume Are for Sale in Metaphysical Supplies Shoppes
// McSweeney's
Occam's Disposable Razors
Meinong's Unicorn (deed of ownership only)
Beetle in a Box (beetle is only visible to us, but we promise it's there)
Neurathian Bootstrap (sold as is)
Abyss-Gazing Glasses
Owl of Minerva Pellets (only for sale after midnight)
Square Circles
Pin The Name on The Tao Party Game
"I Can't Believe it's Not Water!" (bottled on twin earth)
Model Ship of Theseus (some parts missing)
Brain Vats
A Priori Essential Oil
Powdered Pineal Gland
Assorted Monads
Instant Epokhe
Black Swan Feathers (good for rare occasions)
Intellectual Intuitions
Cartesian Candles (made of 100% bee's wax, emits lumen naturale)
Qualia Variety Pack
Tincture Of Nothingness
How to be a Bat, and Other Familiars Guidebook
Extract of Noumenon
"Be Sure to Visit Our Chinese Room While You're Here!"
Logos (already gathered, but not unfurled)
Hypokeimenon Starter Kit
Form of a Table (made from 100% tableness)
The Kierkegaarden Grow Kit (to cultivate your herbal garden)
Atlas of All Possible Worlds
Leviathins Diet Snacks
Berkeley's Surveillance Cameras (so things don't disappear when you're not looking)
Some Kind of Crystals and Shit
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